You know you're making progress when...

I can hardly believe this myself, but I just gave a bilingual homily in chapel. That's right. I wrote an homily based on the story of the good samaritan and then Ozzie helped me to translate it into Thai. And then this morning I stood in front of a room of 50 Thai college students and spoke to them in English and in Thai. It was a lot of firsts at one time. And it was at 7:30 in the morning.

I know my previous post on chapel wasn't entirely positive and maybe that caused some concern. But I want to make it clear that chapel has been going really well. It really has. I have the unfortunate tendency to take a rather cynical point of view sometimes. But honestly, if I were in the student's shoes, I would not want to be there! Get up early so I can sit through some boring worship service that I don't understand and don't identify with? I mean, let's be real. The nursing students are, thankfully, very respectful. In return, my hope is to make it all as painless as possible. And I am being tentative about it and trying to be culturally sensitive. I think there are a couple of fallacies about religion and culture. 1) That they are synonymous and 2) that they can be completely divorced from one another. I don't think either is true.

That means that, in my view, Christianity is not "American," or even "Western," although it has certainly helped shape these cultures. But we march in to other cultures with our worship songs and our cultural interpretations of the gospel and end up making people become not just Christian, but our "brand" of Christian. Khao jai mai? And sometimes it's just laughable. For instance, you can't (according to Rob) really translate a lot of the traditional western hymns into Thai because the notes don't follow the Thai tones. I guess some of the translations are pretty painful. But to say that religion has nothing to do with culture, that it doesn't change culture, is ridiculous. I can't convert to another religion and keep my former culture entirely intact. so once again, we have a question of values. Who determines them and how do we apply them to life? If I value cultural diversity over all else, I'm going to have little patience with missionaries and English teachers and "destroyers of culture." If I value my faith over culture, I'm not going to have many scruples about how my actions affect cultural diversity. To say that people with these different sets of values can come to a mutual agreement is completely unrealistic. And that is often the two types of people who rub shoulders in Thailand.

And thus I find myself trying to tread lightly. When we were trying to translate my homily into Thai, Ozzie made the observation that the dictionary had a lot of religious words and also a lot of words related to sex. Basically, the writers know the types of farang who are coming to Thailand. Now, wouldn't it be awful if it was the sex tourists who displayed an interest in Thai culture and made more of an effort to understand it while the Christian missionaries simply ignored it all in their drive to convert people? As an outsider, what would you think? To be clear, I don't consider myself to be here as a "missionary" any more than I consider myself to be "missionary" in the u.s. But I do consider myself a Christian. And as such I am representing something. someone in fact. And so I have to be careful. 

Music PSA

This week's music psa is brought to you by smac, who is a source of many cool things. Thanks for sharing this video. It features some pretty impressive beards, a cello, a banjo and one very stylish hat. These folks seem pretty cool. I especially enjoy the use of "natural" percussion.

I have the best friends in the world...

It's true. I am so blessed to have so many awesome people in my life. I miss every single one of you but it's so great to see what happens with everyone, even when we live in very different parts of the world. Excuse the sappiness but I got the most wonderful package in the mail yesterday. I had to go to Esther's for a meeting and I was immediately accosted by Gax. "Heidi! What's this!?" he yelled "It looks like an LP Record!"

"It says Wall Decoration..." I mumbled, a slow smile spreading across my face as I read who it was from. I opened the envelope to discover this. Thank you sam!!! At first I wasn't going to publicly embarrass you, but it's such a creative gift I couldn't help it.

 You can't really see, but the record is of a Bach cantata, all in German and features Dietrich Fischer-Diskau. For the record (no pun intended), the only reason I know who that is is because of Music History II with Dr. strauch. Anyhow, it is pretty amazing and pretty much made my day. somehow things like this have a way of arriving on the exact days that I need a little extra encouragement. so thank you sam. Everyone was pretty amazed. It's funny because over Christmas Gax and I discovered a mutual love for Bach and he dug out some recordings for me. Plus it gave me an excuse to talk about all of the great people in these pictures. It seems like it is so rare to find solid friends like the ones I have. I have been totally spoiled with so many great relationships! You guys rock my socks.

To do list and a few cultural items

Get motorbike serviced - check. I meant to do this in... oh, November. But going to a mechanic is intimidating enough in the states. I asked Gax where I should go, and he told me to go to the mechanic next to the gas station. I couldn't find it. Today I finally discovered that it is about the width of an elevator and, of course, I can't read the Thai script on the sign. The mechanic didn't speak English, so I had to mime checking the tires and oil and point to my broken mirror while saying things like "check oIL ka, check TIREs ka, check BRAKEs ka." But my bike has now been serviced and feels like a new machine. Yay! I don't have to worry about breaking down anymore.

Get a haircut - check. I've been putting this for weeks. Going to a stylist is intimidating enough in the states. I asked around and sarah recommended that I go to a place behind Carrefour. But I couldn't find it at first because I was looking on the wrong side of Carrefour. When I finally did locate it, I tried to explain that I just wanted my bangs trimmed and that they were side bangs. The guy seemed to speak pretty good English, but after listening carefully he proceeded to cut them straight across. Awesome. so I asked one of the students what I should do and she recommended a stylist right across the street from the dorm. Went there today and got my bangs cut again and my hair trimmed. They barely spoke any English but one of the customers did, thankfully, and was able to translate for me. They understood better, but they still didn't do it quite right. Both times I expected there to be spray bottles and clips and lots of measuring and checking length, like at my stylist at home. Nope. Both times they just combed my hair a little bit and eyeballed it. Oh well. I give up. Vanity is a vice, isn't it?

Go to the music department - check! I've wanted to do this since November but between one thing and another, I've never gotten around to it. I did go in a couple times but it was during their lunch hour... and a half. But I can use their practice rooms in the mornings. Time to regain all the music skills I've lost.

On sunday I took one of the students (or rather, she took me) to the walking street market again. Once again, it is pretty cool to have your own personal tour guide and this time we went in a lot of the temples and I asked a lot of questions. There were some cool pictures of Chiang Mai in 1926 in one of them. I tried to picture Chiang Mai alongside spokane at that time.

Going to the market with this student is always an adventure. I almost get to see Chiang Mai through Thai eyes when I am with her. Things that seem odd to me are a part of normal life for her, and having her explain them makes me feel more connected with daily life here and how things work. However, it's a bit overwhelming at times. One of my favorite authors, James Herriot, tells a story about a colleague who practically kills him with generosity. His colleague is so big-hearted and generous that he offers James anything that he shows an interest in or compliments: cigars, shirts, you name it. He won't take 'no' for an answer. Unfortunately this generosity is often smothering, especially when Granville and James go out for drinks... You should read it, it's hilarious, and also a pretty good picture of how I feel when I go to the market with this student. she is so eager to show me things and so generous that she wants me to try everything and offers me half of everything she buys. This means I get to try some rather interesting food items.

The first time she eagerly bought me an omelette with bee eggs and fish stomach soup. "Here Pi' Heidi! Try some fish stomach soup!" she says eagerly, her face all anticipation. "Oh! Okay!" I say, trying channel my fear into forced excitement. Because I can't say no. I certainly can't go "eww! disgusting!" Not with her big brown eyes awaiting my approval. And so I eat fish stomach soup, doing my best not to grimace and to give it an unbiased appraisal.

This week it was chicken fingers. But this time we had company. Ozzie, Glory and Ozzie's friend Eric were with us and were uninitiated with this student's sense of hospitality. As usual she went to buy "her" dinner, of which she would expect us to eat at least half. As soon as she set the food down I plunged right in, preferring to find out what I was eating after the deed was done. "Pi' Ozzie! Pi' Glory! Try some chicken fingers!" she says, taking one for herself. Ozzie and Glory aren't quite as "greng jai" as I am (more on that later) and the fear showed plainly on their faces. I meanwhile was pondering on the fact that part of a chicken's foot was now residing in my stomach. The crunchy bits must have been the tendons. Ozzie and Glory however got to consider the full import of this knowledge prior to the actual experience and from their reactions it dawned on our guide that farang may not be all that fond of eating chicken fingers. Ozzie and Glory were good sports and tried it (and later sprang it on Eric when he joined us) and we had a good laugh about it but I had the weirdest urge to kick all my fellow farang under the table. I should have been relieved to have the burden of eating everything I'm offered lifted from me. But I couldn't help feeling that a barrier had been raised somehow.

This nursing student had simply been showing me her Chiang Mai. Her Thailand. Not Thailand for tourists. Not Thailand for study abroad students. Here we were, the only farang in sight, sitting cross-legged on the ground at a short table. This student hadn't been trying to gross us out or even to test us or stretch us. she'd simply been trying to share. she had no idea that it was weird for us to eat this stuff. But now she'll be more self-conscious. I won't get to marvel at her grabbing a snack of chicken fingers as though they were a plate of french fries and casually offering me one. I feel like I've become one step removed from that window into life here. I guess to me, that was worth having to eat some rather questionable things. If that makes sense.

But in other ways, I don't need that window. Thai culture doesn't always feel that foreign to me. Case in point: greng jai. I don't know the literal translation, but everyone warned me about it when I first came. "There's this thing called greng jai... Thai people won't say what they really mean because they don't want to cause conflict." Okay. Well, that is my family. I don't know if it's a scandinavian thing or what, but my family is painfully non-confrontational. For instance, whenever we go out to eat it takes us about half an hour to actually agree on a restaurant, not because we're arguing but because no one wants to have an opinion in case someone else really wants to go to a different place. At the actual restaurant, if someone gets an order wrong, we're not the kind of people to make a big fuss and send it back. No, most likely we'll just eat what gets put in front of us, whether or not it was what we ordered.

People have told me that I should assert myself and have an opinion. It's not good to repress your desires or some such. But that's not it at all. When I don't give an opinion or a preference, it's because I really don't have an opinion or a preference. It really is more important to me that everyone in the group is happy with the place that we go. If I did have a preference, and ended up getting my way, I would be unhappy if I knew that someone else was unhappy with that choice. That is greng jai. It's the same with the food orders. If the restaurant messes up my order, and I get the wrong thing, I don't want to make a scene. I don't like being the center of attention for one, and I know that it will probably get the waiter or chef into trouble and they have a hard enough job as it is. Mistakes happen. I make them all the time. Unless it's a food I absolutely loath (of which there are few) I'll probably decide that, well, it's not what I had in mind but it looks very nice too and it will be much easier for all involved if we just keep the peace. Greng jai.

so while there are many ways in which Thai culture is absolutely foreign, there are some things that I find I understand surprisingly well. Ironically I find myself trying to explain "greng jai" to the other volunteers who have been here longer than I have. People really do not get it. Once again, it goes back to values, which is something my brother talks about a lot. People act on what is important to them. Greng jai is not a particularly selfless concept. It's not that I'm trying to be a good person or anything. It's just that I naturally dislike conflict. Avoiding conflict is one of my values. It's not always a good thing. Conflict can be beneficial. sometimes I put up with really ridiculous stuff because of trying to avoid it. But it's how I work.

Classical Music PSA

Thought about skipping this this week, but I couldn't resist. After all, it wouldn't really be my blog without a little bit of Mozart's Requiem included. The moment at 1:13 absolutely kills me every. single. time. 

Oliphaunt

For more pictures, click here.

"so there are Oliphaunts, and I have seen one. What a life! But no one at home will ever believe me. Well, if that's over, I'll have a bit of sleep." ~sam gamgee, The Two Towers 

"And if you never stop when you wave goodbye..."

...you just might find, if you give it time, you might wave hello again." Why am I quoting "Wheel" by John Mayer? Because you really never know what might happen. I've just returned from the most wonderful day trip with Zoe. As in Zoe from New Zealand who I worked with at Montrose this time last year. Little did I imagine then that a year later we would be in Thailand together. Well, really, little did I imagine that I would be in Thailand period, but there you have it. 


Not that the reunion was entirely serendipitous. In true Kiwi style, Zoe has been having her OE, or Overseas Experience. she's just spent several months traveling in Turkey, Egypt, Greece, England and Ireland. Not too long ago, she messaged me asking if I would be around when she stopped in Thailand and of course I said yes. And so it was that yesterday afternoon I drove my motorbike to one of the hostels in town and there, sitting on the veranda, was "Zoicle" as we occasionally called her. 


We had a great time. she only had a couple of days in Chiang Mai, but that made it easier to know what to do, especially as I was a bit nervous about my knowledge of tourist activities here. After a quick lunch, I decided we had just enough time to make it up to Doi suthep. In the interest of saving money I decided to try taking her up the mountain on my motorbike. I was a bit nervous about this however, because I only have an automatic and it's overdue for a visit to the mechanic besides. But I decided we would give it a try and my reliable Mio came through. It hasn't failed me yet.


It was great to have a bit of a travel companion and it's always fun to show people around a place that you are familiar with and they are not. After Doi suthep I showed her a couple of other impressive temples in the city and then we went to the weekly spaghetti dinner at Esther and Rob's (again in the interest of saving money). It was strange to have my co-workers from this year meeting a co-worker from last year. I think the world really is getting smaller. Afterwards we wandered a couple of the local markets and I pointed out some of the more interesting food items as well as some of the more appetizing ones. 


The only thing Zoe had mentioned as a must-do was to see some elephants. My original plan was to motorbike to one of the nearby elephant camps, since taxis are so expensive. But Zoe managed to find a really good tour package through her hostel and booked both of us on a half day excursion. sometimes having experience in the tourism industry comes in handy. Our group was truly international with citizens of spain, Oman, Australia and New Zealand of course. I was the only American. The camp was about an hour's drive north of town. Our "tour" started with an elephant "show" of sorts in which I witnessed elephants doing everything from playing soccer to playing the harmonica. After this I actually got to ride on one of the elephants. It kind of happened by accident. I was just hanging around and one of the trainers (mahout?) told to hop  on. The day also included an ox cart ride, bamboo "rafting," and an elephant ride through the jungle. It was so surreal to be sitting atop an elephant(!) in Thailand (!) reminiscing about the backpackers and Franz Josef with Zoe (!) I had a great time, as did Zoe. We returned to Chiang Mai just in time for Zoe to catch her bus back to Bangkok en route to Phuket. We said our goodbyes, but only casually. After all, who knows where we might meet up next.